In an e-mail Feinberg sent us it said, "It is clear that you got it. Now the question must be can you live it?" I think this statement has a lot of bearing on the situation right now. We are done with CSR 309; done with learning the ins and outs of leadership. Its clear by the grades on some of my papers that I 'got it,' but can I live it?

If I were to evaluate my leadership ability and how it advanced throughout the semester, I do not think I did anything extravagant. I did step up in one group and become the leader, but there is not really a whole lot to it. I am running for vice president of a club I'm involved in, and hopefully I'll be a great leader next year. I have little reminders scattered throughout my room, purse, and car to remind me what it takes to be a great leader, but what it all comes down to is living it, right?

I now set goals on Sundays of what I want to accomplish in that week. I have goals for this semester, summer, etc. I try to bring love to other people's lives; little things that hopefully make a big difference. I have not figured out a way to make a big difference, but that's one of my goals.

CSR 309 was more than class to me and I'm pretty sure to just about everyone else who has ever taken the class. I believe it changed my life, maybe not on a large scale at this point, but I will always remember the lessons learned and try to implement them in my life every day.

Yesterday's lecture was one of my favorite so far. Dr. Feinberg talked about making decisions, something I will admit is not a strong point of mine. When it comes to a formal situation I have the ability to make a strong decision when the time comes, but in my personal life I postpone decisions as long as I can (and I'm very good at it).

A lesson Feinberg stressed again and again was that everyone needs to have a say in the decision; if they do not, then they will most likely not follow along with it. I have been working at Bath and Body Works in the mall since the beginning of the year. I started there as a Customer Sales Lead (a "kinda" manager) in charge of shipment. I'm not in that position anymore but merely a sales associate since that position was only needed during Christmas time. I really enjoy this job and have learned a lot from my managers. The co-manager of the store, Pam, is a very good leader and I feel I can learn a lot from her.

Pam is a good decision maker. During Christmas time she knew she did not know how shipment was getting put away, so if there was a question or a decision that needed to be made about it, she asked me, I guess you could say I was the "expert" when it came to shipment. Even though I'm not in that position anymore she still came to me when it came time to move our store to a different location and the backroom needed organized. I was put in charge of deciding where everything would go, and was given a small team to help me. This was difficult task. For heavens sake, I had no idea where the best spot for the shower gel would be, and where were we going to put the antibacteria soap!

So during the three days of moving I asked the members of my team, as well as the management staff, where the best place to put something would be if I did not already have a plan for it. I knew that once the store was ready to open I would not always be the person working, and what works for me might not work for the rest of the employees. Because I allowed others to have an input on the decision they all felt more a part of it and followed along with it. The backroom runs smoothly now and I'm very proud of the way my team and I put it together, not to mention I received much validation for my efforts!

Yesterday in class the discussion had to do with communication. Feinberg had many messages, but at the end of class he highlighted his main two.

1. Two way communication is better than one way.
2. Active listening is good.

These messages reminded me of a Seinfeld episode (sorry, Seinfeld had to come up at least once in my blog). In this particular one George is working for the Yankees and he happens to be using the restroom at the same time as his boss. As George washes his hands, his boss begins to give him a work assignment from the stall where is he doing his business, to which George heard none of. When his boss comes out of the bathroom he says to George "so is everything clear," George responds "crystal clear sir," although he has not heard a thing his boss said.

So now George has a very important assignment, and he has no idea what he is suppose to do for it. Jerry suggest he just ask his boss questions about the assignment to try to figure it out, so George does. As his boss walks by, George tells him he's having some trouble getting started and wanted to know where the best place to start would be, his boss says "well probably with accounting, is that all," and George says yes. He's still perplexed as to what his assignment is and does not figure it out until the very end of the episode (conveniently).

If George would have just used two-way communication he could have avoided this whole problem. When his boss asked him if everything was clear he could have responded that it was not and a little more explaining would help. I'm sure his boss would much rather preferred explaining it again, then and there in the restroom, than a couple of days later when George still has no idea what was going on.

My group met tonight at Jake's Roadhouse for a meeting. We met for about 30 minutes, then said "okay that's enough school talk" and we just hung out and got to know each other.

Since my group leader Ross was not at the last class meeting when we discussed the group, he was given the cliff's notes. He sent us all and e-mail the next day and apologized for being a terrible leader. I do not blame him for being a bad leader. I believe a leader is only as good as the people he is leading. No one in the group had ever brought it to his attention that we did not have good communication, or that we did not know each other. I do not know if he thought everything was going good, or if he thought none of the group members really cared about group cohesiveness.

But Ross now realizes he needs to make more of a group structure and has done a great job so far. This meeting allowed us to get to know each other. I do not know everyone's names yet, but I'll be able to spot people in class and know they are in my group. We have planned to meet at least once a week as just a get-together. I think this will allow us to be an actual group and not just some people under one leader.

Today CSR 309 was a little confusing. The president of the class, Joe, asked all the group leaders to come to the front and they all had a discussion amongst themselves for about 10 minutes. After a few minutes I noticed my group leader was not down there. Oh, how convenient, one of the few class times we actually meet in groups, my leader misses class. I was sitting next to Michelle, who's in my group, and I debated for a while if one of us should go down there to get the information that most likely is pretty important. Finally the group of leaders split up and gathered there groups, which left me even more confused as what to do.

That's where the first problem arose. My group has met, maybe twice. We met during tower building and then a meeting before group memo 1 was due. I only know one other member of my group because I had another class with him. We are now a little halfway through this sememster and I do not know the other members of my group, let alone my leader.

We finally all got together and started the assignment. This was actually a good activity. My group got to know each other, and shared ideas of how to make our group better. I guess it was sort of a good thing that Ross was not there. We did not bash him or anything, but we were free to share ideas and things that we thought he could do better, without fearing hurting his feelings to his face.

We came to the concussion that everyone in the group are great communicators, and feel we can communicate freely, but the structure to communicate within the group is not there. Everyone knows they can e-mail Ross with whatever they want, but no one feels we can e-mail others in our group. I think this is because we have never taken the time to get to know each other. Some of this blame was placed on Ross for not getting us all together.

I think this class time has made a great impact on my group. Although our leader did not take the initiative to gather the group, the group members put our ideas together to make us a better group. This will allow us to not only communicate better, but we will undoubtfully get better grades on papers because we now feel able to ask each other questions.

So my leadership lesson this class is simple. Even though my leader was not doing a good job as a leader, the members of the group were able to still get things done and turn around our group.

Recently I wrote a "living obituary" for CSR 309. Oddly enough, I wrote it about one of my peers who I have only meet for a few minutes. At first I was thinking, what does this have to do with leadership? How am I going to be a better leader by learning the "first meeting basics" about a kid I will probably never see again? And what does it help that some stranger is learning only what he has to about me to write a paper?

But as I was doing a little more research into it, it started to make sense. A obituary is what the world will remember us by. We don't get to write it, we don't get to decide what is said. If I (God forbid) were to die today, what type of legacy would be left behind to write about in my obituary? Right now, its the "first meeting basics" that would be covered.

A great leader leaves behind more than the first meeting basics. People do not come to their funeral and talk about where they went to college and what types of jobs they had, how their kids are doing now and how greatly they will be missed. A great leader will be missed because there will be a void that will need to be filled because of their loss. They will be remember for and by the people the touched (not in the physical way, hopefully) and the great things they did.

My peer I wrote the living obituary about did not have anything remarkable for me to say about him. I didn't have anything remarkable to give to him to say about myself. But starting today I'm going to become a better leader, so when I do step through those pearlly gates I will be remembered by the deeds I did and the people I touched.

In one of my classes this semester I volunteered to be the leader of my group. I believe we were put into groups and asked to designate a leader around the time Dr . Feinberg yelled at everyone who did not step up in CSR 309 to be a leader. His voice was ringing in my head to always take a leadership opportunity when it comes available. So now I am the leader of a group of four, we are assigned in seats around each other so during class we can have small group discussions and we will also be doing a larger project within this group later this semester.

Although it is only a small group, I am faced with some leadership problems. One would be my groups lack of effort put forth when we have group discussion. The other members of my group tend to want to get done with the assignment and they do not put genuine thought into each answer. This bothers me because it is not what the whole point of discussing in groups is all about. It is also never fail that at least one of the group members is not in class on any given day. This hurts the group because all input is helpful.

This reminded me of when Kirk Weisler spoke to us and said we should be making our organization a great culture to be in. I need to be a better leader in my group and encourage a good environment where discussion is open. If we all continue to say the easy answer and get done with the questions as fast as we can, we are not learning any lessons. I need to remember Kirk's lessons during class that people will preform better when they feel loved and cared about.